from behind the brick wall

it's so safe here, won't you join me?

actually, please don't.

not for real.

you can be over there, see?

perfect.

everything is still safe, but i'm not alone anymore.

oh no, knocknig on the door.

please go away?

great.

wrap it up quick and sink into safeness again.

finally.

so, how are you, and don't be honest.

i love my world.

i love my brick wall.

i love the screen where you are.

i love my screen, because it's safe.

no real eyes to look at me.

no real voices to hear.

it's me, my music and a distant you.

i can't handle "in real life"

that's why...

i'll sit here.

greetings from behind the brick wall.

blame

You take the blame for things you haven't done.

You hate yourself for others mistakes.

You won't forgive yourself, even though you've done nothing wrong.

What is there to forgive?

What part of you is there to hate?

How can anyone blame you?

I forgive you for being so wonderful.

I hate you for making me so happy.

I blame you for my smiles.

Realize the truth, there is nothing but love for you.

crush

Sugary sweet words turn into tears of acid.
Burning their way to my heart.
Exposing it to you again.

Will you crush me this time?

I'm always forgiving, never forgetting.
You said sorry, so I guess it's fine?
My heart still leaks when I think of it though.

You always crush me.

Sugary acidic world of mine.
Forgetting to forgive when my heart leaks.
I guess it's fine to be exposed to you.

I will always let you crush me.

definitely maybe

How come you're so unsure depending on who I am?
Why won't you ever give me a straight answer?
Have you ever told yourself the truth?
Is happiness a choice?
If it is, why won't we choose it for ourselves?
If it isn't, how will we ever deserve it?
Your eyes can't focus, your breathing is uneven.

Your hands shake, your heart stops beating.

Your mouth might form the words, but you're always silent.
The feeling of panic when you have to decide something.

The regret after making a choice.

The question of right or wrong.
Why is it so hard?

Are you happy?

Definitely maybe.

Expectations

A thought.

Stuck.

A smile.

Struck.

Expectations that won't let you rest.

Disappointment, 'cause you'll never get the best.

You will get what you deserve.

fine

Leave me alone when you have no clue about what's going on.

Be with me when I'm silent and won't say a word.

Never ask me how I am, you alreday know I'm "fine".

Don't look, don't speak, don't hear.

I'm fine. And you always believe it.

empty. lost. and screaming.

If I think, I feel.
If I feel, I need to know.
I don't know, so I scream.
I can't scream, I'm not me.
I'm lost, I think...

hunger

The wind embraces me with more warmth than you ever have, I hunger for your love.

Storms have made me feel safer than you ever have, I needed you.

Hail has spoken to me with more wisdom than you ever have, why do you stay silent?

Raindrops have weeped with me, why were you never the cloud?

Darkness has surrounded me, you stole my light.

When will you let me breath again?

stop

Stop sticking your fingers down my throat, the only thing I'll throw up is what you've done to me.

Stop suffocating my heart with your hands, I'm already ice and you can't breath my oxygen.

Stop focusing your eyes on me, haven't you done enough looking already?

Stop speaking, I will never listen to you, when have you ever said anything intelligent?

Stop being, I don't need you to exist.

stabbed in the back

Joyfully expecting.

Happiness flowing.

Words piercing.

World crumbling.

Hate boiling.

Blank expressions.

Goodbye.

Good luck.

words like violence

Do you know what is spewing out of your rotten mouth?
Do you know that your words are venomous bullets penetrating the souls of your victims?
Do you know your actions cause minds to alter?

Do you know that your victims will start to believe they're worth nothing when you tell them every day?
Do you know your existence will cause permanent marks in their hearts?

Do you know you're all the things you tell others they are?

broken soul

All your feelings melt into one.
You can't feel it.
It dislocates you from yourself.
It breakes you down, splittng your every atom into millions.

Crumbled, unable to tell someone how you feel.
Whispering questions to the distant night-sky.
Silent shouting gives you nothing back.

Desperately trying to fixate your smile into others eyes.
Try to convince them that you are strong.

A broken soul and a fading smile is what's gonna be left.